Dude Sitting Down And Telling His Girlfriend All The Cheating He Did Is The Dumbest Person Alive

If you sit down with your girlfriend, break-up, and have an “honest” conversation like this then you’re an absolute jabroni. A fool’s fool. A total asshole. In fact, if you do shit like this then you’re the biggest asshole alive. Don’t confess, don’t be genuine, just say the relationship is over and move on with your life. No one needs to hear all your little dirty secrets.

Because there you’re not just ruining this relationship, you’re ruining every other relationship this girl is ever gonna have. She’ll never trust anyone, she’ll never believe that anyone’s faithful, because you had to confess to cheating “I wasn’t counting” times. You don’t have to go the “it’s not you, it’s me” route during a breakup, but you sure as shit don’t go the truthful route either. Say it’s your fault, say it’s over, and get out of the conversation. If you’re in the middle of a huge blowout then sure, try your best to hurt one another, that’s both love and war so absolutely everything is fair game. But this sitdown, calm conversation? Never be honest because that just means you’re an incredible dickhead. Honesty is never the best policy. Lie, let ‘em down easy, and go back to your scumbag life.

PS – Unless you can get 162k retweets out of it. Then I guess do it because nothing is more valuable than social interaction.

PPS – Hey girl, call me. I won’t cheat because I’m too lazy.

The rarely seen PPPS – What exactly did this girl think was gonna happen when she got on set? Two chairs facing each other with a muted background and a camera crew is like being driven to the middle of nowhere by some gangsters: you should know you’re about to get a bullet to the brain.